A Purrfect Relationship
by Fooruman the Great
Summary: Ms. Norris and Crookshanks meet in Harry's third year. Not a oneshot.
1. The Unforgettable Meeting

A Purrfect Relationship 

Chapter 1.

The Unforgettable Meeting

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of these characters, or locations. Harry Potter is copyrighted © J. K Rowling and Warner Brothers. All rights reserved.

Filch was patrolling the corridors, something he could be found doing frequently. With him was his second-in-command, Ms. Norris. The cat was an expert at finding students, as her superior senses of smell and hearing could let her know the whereabouts of students neither Filch nor her could see.

Filch was not too bad either. Although nose had been slowly weakening after smelling the putrid stench of dungbombs, his long experience from them lent him the ability to whiff one out from an array of other strong smells.

As Filch and Norris rounded a corner, Filch saw his first troublemaker of the morning. Lavender Brown, attempting to hide behind a suit of armour, was accepting a bag that smelled of dungbombs.

He dived out from the corner, shocking both Lavender and her seller, who turned out to be George Weasley, the red haired troublemaker. As far as he was concerned, those two twins caused him almost as much trouble as his arch-nemesis, Peeves, the ink throwing, gum blowing, and many others. Were one to create a Hogwarts Encyclopedia, including a list of every recorded trick done by Peeves, the list would add an extra 7 or so pages to the book. Filch awaited the arrival of a new headmaster or headmistress, who would expel Peeves from the castle, and maybe even let him whip the students.

Yelling angrily at the troublemakers, Filch led them to his office, after investigating the bag to discover it did indeed contain dungbombs. Ms. Norris was left to patrol the corridors, but encountered an unlikely surprise the first corner she turned around.

There was a ginger cat there, calmly licking himself clean.

Ms. Norris hissed and arched her back, for as far as she was concerned, any other cats would be invading her turf. The other calmly raised its head, and began to purr.


	2. The Little Things That Count

A Purrfect Relationship

Chapter 2.

The Little Things That Count

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of these characters, or locations. Harry Potter is copyrighted © J. K Rowling and Warner Brothers. All rights reserved.

(Random Tiny Little Sort Of Only A Little Author's Note: This chapter switches to Crookshanks' point of view.)

I stared at the beautiful feline in front of me. What an attractive cat! Perhaps we could go rat hunting in the future! But, I must introduce myself. Never let it be said my noble bloodline has no manners.

I purred, and meowed a gentle greeting. Much to my surprise, instead of rubbing noses or meowing back, she angrily hissed.

Oh, I must just have said the wrong thing. I meowed again, a softer meow, whilst inwardly counting the ways I loved her yellow eyes, her beautiful fur, and—

My love was in danger! Up approached that red headed boy, who owned that no-good rat! My kneazle powers did not detect the same aura of a dishonest creature, but he could not be too much better than his rat. And there was my kind owner, walking with him!

"It's Ms. Norris, and without Filch around too! No one would know if I gave her a good kick!""Oh, Ron, don't-" urged my kindly owner, but she was not able to complete her sentence, as I leaped onto he who would do my love hurt, and clawed at his leg, howling and hissing.

"Hermione! Your bloody cat's gone crazy!" yelled the red haired menace, as he fought to kick me off. He raised his wand, and yelled "Expelliarmus!" The spell went quite off target, as I got in a good claw in his right hand at that moment. It shot towards my newfound kitty companion, and she was blasted against the wall.

I suddenly got a strong feeling that there was a dishonest creature nearby, and suddenly a filthy and ugly man appeared on the scene as though it looked like he had taken a secret passageway.

"What've you ruffians done to my cat! Detention! To my office, Granger, Weasley!"

He ran and scooped up my distraught friend. He must be kidnapping her! Yowling, I leaped off the leg of my former enemy, and climbed up to the face of my new one, which I began scratching, eager to save my beautiful newfound love.

The Crookshanks family line would be proud of me, if only they could see me now.


	3. The Squid and the Spider

A Purrfect Relationship

Chapter 3

The Squid and the Spider

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of these characters, or locations. Harry Potter is copyrighted © J. K Rowling and Warner Brothers. All rights reserved.

In the end, I was Stupefied and was unable to continue my fierce defending of my love. Fortunately, she still roams the corridors, which leads me to believe she was not brutally murdered by my aggressor, who, as she tells me now, is her pet, Argus Filch.

I think she might like me now – but she doesn't let me go out rat hunting with her. My preferred time is in the night, but she refuses, as that is when she must patrol for students out of beds too late. I suggest she just sneaks away, but she's too much like my owner. A rule would sooner break her than she'd break one.

Though, she might still remember what happened last time she snuck away and went mousing with me. Let me tell you.

Her pet was asleep, so we snuck off together, purring as we went. We leapt up to a window, and quietly edged out it. Then a horrible sound met our ears.

Trees in the forest were falling down every second, and water was splashing all over from the black lake. I thought it was the end of the world, and I was scar – but because of my noble family line, I would never be scared, and stood bravely to protect my love.

As seven trees near the edge of the forest fell, the water splashing was multlipied, and a huge abomination came out of the Forbidden Forest.

It was the size of a small elephant – and it had too many legs to be allowed. It tromped slowly toward the black lake, crashing into things as it went. The splashing water increased more and more.

And then it stopped. For a moment, I hoped whatever was making it had died. But a horrible sound met our ears.

SlAlEXzYpIUrnbWOugi!

SlAlEXzYpIUrnbWOugi!

Ms. Norris, as I have learned as the name of my love, meowed quietly to me, that the giant squid was performing its mating dance. We immediately jumped back up to the window in absolute shoc – but I was brave! – and lay quiver – um, wait, that was what Ms. Norris did! Yeah! She quivered, I was just petrified in shoc – this, um, is all. Um, a joke, you know! I'm really brave. Sort of. A little. Okay, not really.

That was a terrible occasion. But right now, I'm dining on rooster with my love. I killed one belonging to that ugly gamekeeper – he won't miss it.

Really, our relationship is just that. It's purrfect. It's a purrfect relationship.

But maybe I'll ask her if she wants to have kittens someday…

So that's my story. I am Crookshanks. King of charming nice little lady cats.

THE END

(Random Sort Of Author's Note A Little Sort Of Maybe Only A Little I Promise Well Maybe Not Really: I guess that's it. Sort of short, eh? Well, I didn't really have much in mind. It's just a nice little happy relationship. A purrfect one.)


End file.
